Everything began to blur that day. I was sixteen and scared, pregnant, and alone in a room filled with people telling me what to do. I thought I would still be their daughter. I thought they would help me. <\/p>\n
My parents insisted it was better this way. “We love you,” my mother said. Did she? I mean, maybe she thought she was doing the right thing. But I felt thrown aside like a bad dream. I remember the blue curtains in the hospital room. They fluttered gently in the breeze, but inside, everything was still. <\/p>\n
Once the baby came, my heart felt full for a moment. Then the nurses took him away, saying it was best. I did not really understand. I just wanted to hold him. The next time I saw my parents, they looked relieved. I just wanted them to hold me too.<\/p>\n
Days turned into a blur of sadness. They told me I was being selfish. I should think of his future. I think they believed it. Every time I tried to talk about my feelings, they shut me down. I started to doubt my own memories. Was I wrong to want my child? <\/p>\n
Life became routine. I went to school, pretended to focus. Friends laughed, planning futures I could not join. I drifted. The world moved on. I learned to smile politely and talk about things that didn’t matter. <\/p>\n
Then came the years. I moved on, or tried to. I graduated, found work, and lived in a small apartment in a busy city. Each room felt quiet, reflecting the emptiness inside me. Yet, I kept going.<\/p>\n
Every year on his birthday, I lit a candle. I found a small blue candle once, the same shade as the hospital curtains. I placed it on my kitchen counter, letting it melt as I thought about him. I never gave up on the hope that one day, I would find him.<\/p>\n
Then that day came. I was sitting in my apartment, scrolling mindlessly through old files on my computer. A message pinged on my screen. It was from an adoption agency. They were searching for me. <\/p>\n
I sat up straight. I could hardly breathe. “We have information about your child,” the message read. My hands shook, all those years of waiting collapsing into this moment. Did I really want to know?<\/p>\n
I replied cautiously. They sent me photos of a man in his thirties. The resemblance was shocking. I felt my heart jump. Could it really be him? I fought against the urge to hope it was true. <\/p>\n
Days turned into an anxious wait. I kept replaying the memories. Was I wrong to have wanted him? Did my parents truly believe they were saving me? But a small part of me pushed back. I wasn’t wrong. I just wanted to love him.<\/p>\n
Finally, I reached out to him. After all these years, his name was Misaki. I hoped it would lead to healing. Our conversation felt strange yet familiar. He shared stories of his life, moments I missed. I felt his warmth through the screen, even if it was just pixels connecting us.<\/p>\n
Misaki called me one afternoon. \u201cI hope you\u2019re okay with this,\u201d he said. I could tell he was nervous, maybe even scared. \u201cI\u2019ve always wondered about you.\u201d <\/p>\n
What could I say? \u201cYes, I wanted you too.\u201d I felt the weight of those words settle between us. It struck me how much time had passed since I lost him. I wanted to scream, to cry, to do something.<\/p>\n
At one point, he said, \u201cI tried to find you for years. I thought you left me.\u201d His voice trembled. I think I finally understood the pain I had passed on to him. \u201cI was taken from you,\u201d I whispered. <\/p>\n
Every conversation unraveled another thread of my story. I learned Misaki faced struggles. He grew up in a loving family, yet he still felt that missing piece. I could not stop thinking about that small blue candle. <\/p>\n
Days turned into weeks. Each conversation felt weighty but essential. I was terrified but excited. Misaki began to share his hopes, and I couldn\u2019t hold back my tears. Suddenly, I felt something shift. A small doorway opened in my heart. <\/p>\n
Then one night, out of the blue, Misaki sent a photo. It showed a softer moment, just him and a dog he rescued. The light caught his face perfectly. I felt joy mix with pain. How many moments did I miss? <\/p>\n
Yet, somewhere in my mind, a nagging doubt crept in. Was this how it was meant to be? My parents\u2019 words played in my head. Maybe I wasn\u2019t fit to be his mother. I felt my hands go cold. Uncertainty began to cloud my heart again.<\/p>\n
Then came the day Misaki proposed meeting. \u201cI want you to come here,\u201d he said, voice full of warmth. I wanted to scream, \u201cYes!\u201d But fear held me back. What if he saw me and felt different? <\/p>\n
I hesitated. After days of back and forth, I finally agreed. Breaking through the years of silence felt monumental. I planned the trip with a mix of anxiety and excitement. <\/p>\n
The day arrived. I stood at the bus station, heart racing. I wanted to bolt, to hide. But something drew me forward. I boarded the bus, and as I rode, I felt like a different person. <\/p>\n
Walking toward the caf\u00e9 we agreed to meet at felt surreal. But just before I reached the door, a stranger bumped into me. \u201cSorry!\u201d he said quickly. At that moment, I was overwhelmed. The weight of the journey hit me.<\/p>\n
I opened the caf\u00e9 door, and there he was. We locked eyes. Misaki looked just like that photo, but more alive. I felt warmth rush over me as I took a deep breath. This was real.<\/p>\n
I sat down, and words poured out of me. I shared my story, the longing, the pain, and the hope. Misaki listened intently, nodding along. I felt safe. <\/p>\n
Then it was his turn. Misaki opened up about his life, about being adopted. He shared the ache of wondering about me. \u201cI always wanted to meet you, even if I didn\u2019t know how,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n
In that moment, everything shifted. Misaki and I were not just two sides of a coin; we were both incredibly real. I glanced around and saw the same soft blue of the caf\u00e9 curtains as in my memory.<\/p>\n
As I looked back at him, I realized something. I had waited years for this moment\u2014waiting for clarity, for understanding. And today, standing here with him, I felt the candle light I had kept for him flickering back to life. <\/p>\n
No longer just blue, it shone brighter, like a new beginning, even if it hurt. Misaki and I were finally together, and together, we could face everything that came next.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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